Kendrick Perkins Ended Newport Cigs Whole Existance

I normally don’t consume sports talk TV anymore, especially on ESPN. Mainly because I think most of the people on the shows are talentless and just report the sports news from a teleprompter. Nothing is wrong with that but I already get 100 Bleacher Report notifications a day telling me what is going on in the sports universe so I don’t need some suit on TV to reiterate it to me every hour on the hour. Just personal preference. I prefer to be entertained.

There is another group of sports TV personalities that just say whatever they think will get the most clicks. Cough cough, Max Kellerman. I won’t go as far as saying they are talentless because there is definite skill and effort in moving the needle and getting people angry. But again, that isn’t entertaining to me. I like getting mad as much as the next guy and I like to think I am pretty damn good at getting angry. But I can’t get angry when it is clearly being said with zero belief behind it.

Anyway the point I am trying to get to is 99% of the shit they say on First Take is pointless garbage with almost no entertainment to be found. But today Kendrick Perkins hit that 1%,

You know you have struck gold when you get Stephen A Smith to crack. It’s pretty tough to keep that man silent but body bagging Ben Simmons while referencing Newport cigs is well deserving of a tip of the cap. I watched this video no les than 1000 times. I think the reason this stood out to me so much was because it was on ESPN. I didn’t think they were allowed to be funny in a somewhat non PG way. This was way more PG-13 and I fully expect Kendrick Perkins to get a slap on the wrist from his boss, Mickey Mouse. You fully expect this kind of comment from a Charles Barkley or Shaq on TNT. This clip is gold but Kendrick still says it in a button up suit kind of way. Zero emotion in his face and stiff as a board. At least when Chuck and Shaq know they are saying something ridiculous they crack a smile.

Credit where credit is due though, Newports are the bottom of the barrel cig. I don’t smoke cigs and never have but I have been to a gas station before and they have zero curb appeal. I would like to think that I am a Marlboro man for no other reason than that Marlboro man sounds bad ass.

-Woody

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